The Surfing Cow Reveals His Ignorance

Author: David Christopher Lane
Publisher: The NEURAL SURFER
Publication date: May 1998

E-mail David Christopher Lane directly at

I want to go back to the home base now.

The Lane Manifesto:

When I was 4 I didn't know anything Ultimately but I Wondered.

When I was 40 I didn't know anything Ultimately but I Wondered.

In between those two ages, I have found that my "self" or "being"
seems to operate in a number of ways, three of which seem to reflect
our Triune Brain (with credit due to Edward O. Wilson for
articulating a complex subject):

1. HEARTBEAT. When push comes to shove, the BODY takes precedence.
One good example of this is holding one's breath. After about a
minute or so, almost ALL thoughts are centered around ONE goal:

2. HEARTSTRINGS. When the heart is beating and the lungs breathing
and the basic necessities are met, then this LONGING aspect comes
into being. It is an amazing force, this love, this desire, this
yearning. It is the fuel of the mystical endeavor.

3. HEARTLESS. The king of the hill is, paradoxically enough, the
weakest ELEMENT (and the latest edition) in our Self-hood. When
the heart is beating and the strings producing silent harmonies,
the cerebral cortex looks at the PLAY DISPASSIONATELY and via reason
sees the utter complexity of it. The intelligence also sees that
what the heart and body "believes" may have nothing to do with


Or, more Zen-like,

First there is a MOUNTAIN (my heart is beating)

then there is NO MOUNTAIN (my heart is longing)

then there is ONE (my heart sees THROUGH both of them).


Or, more Neural-like,

With JUST a hindbrain the World IS JUST MATERIAL.

With JUST a midbrain the World IS JUST MYSTICAL.

With JUST a forebrain the World IS JUST UNKNOWABLE.


With ALL three working at the same instant,

The World is JUST CON.......FUSING.


Or, more Surfer-like,


And when a Neural Surfer has to Ride THREE PEAKS
(hind/mid/forebrain) at once through complex synapses and dendrites
and axons via chemical-electrical wave fronts through two
complementary hemispheres, it should come as no surprise that
he would be AWE-struck in the process.

His lucidity would be dependent upon which PEAK he was riding.

But one thing is certain:

A wave is ALWAYS smaller/lesser than the OCEAN from which it ARISES.


For me to say that "i" know something absolutely or ultimately is
akin to a cow mooing at the moon thinking it has captured the
majesty of the universe.


In such a dilemma and when confronted with the little categories we

only one reply can be given:



in moo honor of Rich

cow #1, the real Lane


E-mail The Neural Surfer directly at

I want to go back to the home base now.